Your humble professors were honoured to be asked to conduct research in to the flavours of crisps favoured by sheep residing in the south of England, based both on the requestees' knowledge of our current journey and the study conducted by Dr Hunt, proving conclusively that the northern sheep will only imbibe cheese and onion flavour crisps. A copy of the research brief is presented below:
"West Riding sheep pester picnickers for crisps - which must be cheese and onion. One old ram hangs round the Tan Hill pub for handouts all the time.
East Riding sheep are alarmed and disconcerted by offers of crisps of any flavour.
What of the sheep of the south?"
Below follows a description of our methods, our data, and summary of our results.
Methods
A single blind trial was conducted using the Big Four crisp flavours (cheese and onion, prawn cocktail, ready salted and salt and vinegar).
Crisps were laid in piles on the ground by Prof Ewanson whilst Prof Gillson distracted sheep to help ensure their unawaritude of the positions of the different flavours.
Sheep were then introduceed to the scene and allowed to eat freely and with no restrictions. Once sheep had had five minutes of eating time, Prof Gillson distracted them again while Prof Ewanson photographed the remains of the heaps.
Evidence
Figure One: The Initial Piles
This shows the initial piles of crisps. Packets shown for clarity of report: these were removed before sheep were introduced. As you will see, flavours were positioned in alphabetical order from cheese and onion through to salt and vinegar.
Figure Two: Early results
Early indicators show a surprising turn as cheese and onion crisps are spurned in favour of prawn cocktail and ready salted. However no conclusive results at this stage as not enough sheep.
Figure Three: A minor penchant for cheese and onion emerges.
One sheep shows interest in the latter flavour. Interesting developments indeed.
Figure Four: Contemplation.
Having nearly finished their potato-based snack, the sheep stand back to survey the scene.
Figure Five: Completion
Having allowed sufficient time for differential eating preferences to emerge, the sheep are temporarily removed in order for analysis to take place.
Figure Six: Results
The post-feeding piles.
Conclusions
It therefore falls to us to conclude that unlike their northern cousins, sheep of the south show almost equal preferences for prawn cocktail and ready salted crisps. Cheese and onion received a fair amount of attention but fell down at the eating stage. The clear loser was salt and vinegar; this flavour was occasionally sniffed and even licked by the brave few taste pioneers of the sheep world, but none were ingested.
In conclusion, it can be seen that southern sheep display substantially stonger crispophilic tendencies than their East Riding cousins, but without the specific preferences displayed by those of the West Riding.
Ladies and gentlemen of the Royal Society, we humbly submit our conclusions for your consideration and approval.
